Poly BBW Mistress seeking...

It is a drag having to find a new sub. I think I forgot how many I had to sift through to find Mine. I remembered it took a while though. So in preparation for My sub’s departure I have begun seeing what is out there.

So far it’s been pretty ugly. And I don’t mean physically. Recently there was the sub who whined and begged and didn’t listen. Good bye. Then the ghost of subs past reared its ugly head in the form of the submissive I was training before the one I have now. We will call him…Curtis. Because that is his name and he hates it. Anyway I had to let Curtis go because he turned out not to be genuine. Sure his desire to submit was most assuredly real but the rest was obscured in a big old cloud of bullshit. He never completed tasks or journals on time. EVER. And we all know how that gets under My skin. But what is worse is that he lied. A lot. Over and over again. Either that or he had the worst luck of anyone I have met. W/we officially ended because he was arrested. he got drunk at a bar, got into a fight and spent the weekend in jail. Not a big deal. But he refused to tell Me why he up and disappeared. Instead I was told it was none of My business. And that was when it ended but it was not the only reason. Did I mention the lies? And in general he was not at all ready for a real time D/s relationship. he was stuck in the fantasy place.

Since I released him from consideration he has come crawling back every few months to tell Me how he has changed. How he is a different person. He is ready for change. And most recently how badly he needs Me. Blah blah blah. Because all it is is a new brand of bullshit. You can repackage it as much as you want but in the end it’s still a jar full of bullshit. I didn’t buy it the 1st time. Why on earth would I buy it the 7th? And yet he keeps coming back. How very annoying. And I find it is brining out the bitch side of My personality.

See back in the day (before I became the personification of sweetness and light that I am today) I was a bitch of the first order. I routinely fucked with peoples heads for sport. Why? It amused me. I reduced a few teachers to tears for the same reason. If I wanted something I found a way to get it. As evidenced by the 3 bags of shirts in my basement I literally talked off the back of men on the street. It was great fun. My mother always cautioned me to use my powers for good not evil. I’ve only ever wanted to be the evil overlord. And in my youth I honed the skills required of an Evil Overlord. I manipulated and mind fucked as much as I could. Oh not my friends of course. Anyone else was fair game though. Eventually during the course of growing up I realized that I wasn’t going to get to be an Evil Overlord at least in the short term and I stopped using my powers for evil. I got married. I had a kid.

But the parade of bad subs is starting to bring those dormant bitch qualities to the surface. I feel like every time one of them does something so utterly against My will the bitch rears her head. At first I tried to suppress it and always strive to be reasonable. I would rather be a loved Mistress than a feared one. But I think perhaps because I have not shown this side of Myself to the world and potential subs there may be those out there who believe I don’t possess it. I assure you that isn’t the case.

Perhaps I should thank these bad subs for provoking the bitch. I intend to bring that side of Myself into greater balance with the rest of My personality. I don’t think I will be suffering any fools anytime soon.