Sub Report

I have been in contact with My sub overseas. He is adjusting to the new life he will be leading rather well. Though he is anxious to get started. The last time I spoke with him he was basically in holding awaiting assignments. He is not one who likes inactivity so he was basically gnawing at the bit. However all too soon I am sure he will be all too busy. At the store today Jason bought Me a version of Alice in Wonderland that I loved as a kid. It remains My favorite version. It is campy and has a high cheese factor but it is fantastic! Red Buttons as the White Rabbit. Sammy Davis Jr as the Caterpillar. Lovely! As chance would have it this is also My sub’s favorite version of Alice. When he arrives back safely I think that I will watch it with him.

I have dismissed My paysub. For those of you who have heard Me talk about him this will come as no surprise. Though in the past weeks he has been trying much harder to abide by the protocol I have laid down W/we recently came to an impasse. The situation basically boiled down to 2 things. Trust and Respect. I don’t possess the first in regard to him and he does not posses the second in regard to Me. Recently he went on vacation. At no point during the weeks leading up to this vacation did he mention that this would be a private vacation with only his girlfriend. “His girlfriend?” I hear you ask. “But I thought you were done with those who have wives, gfs, husbands, bfs, significant others or are overly fond of their pets!” Well I am. However when I agreed to begin training the paysub he told Me only that there was a girl that he saw occasionally. It wasn’t anything serious. They just saw each other whenever they were both free. Not that often in any case, he promised Me. I took him at his word. 2 weeks in he reveals that this girl that he sees occasionally is actually his girlfriend and they have a scheduled weekly date. Then later it comes out that they have been seeing each other for a year or so. That is a deal breaker for Me because I don’t approve of keeping secrets from significant others. However as I don’t consider the paysub a real D/s I let it slide. So when he told Me that he was going away with his buddies (though he swears he never said such a thing) he was lying (though he does maintain that his buddies were supposed to go but they dropped out on them).

D.R.A.M.A.

I knew something was up when he told me his phone wouldn’t have reception where he was going so he would not be able to make or receive txts so there would be no way to contact him. He went to Hilton Head. Hmm…. Yeah, heavy tourist areas are known for having poor phone reception. 1 + 1 definitely didn’t equal 2. I came to the conclusion that he went away with his girlfriend who knows nothing of his kinky life. When he got back I questioned him. He immediately became highly HIGHLY defensive. See one of his rules is that he is not allowed release without asking permission. You see why significant others complicate this. Up till now he has been feeding Me lines and expecting Me to bite. He has told Me for the past 2 months or so that he has not had sex or messed around with his girlfriend at all. Even when he spends the night at her house. Yeah…. I don’t buy it. To ask Me to believe that he went away for a week on vacation on his birthday to a beach resort and they never once got physical.. well, I am just not gullible enough to believe that.

He didn’t even have the courage to tell Me he went away with his gf. I had to ask. His excuse for the lack of sex? She was on her period. Apparently for the entirety of the 7 plus days.

Not one bit of this strikes Me as truthful. Instead it strikes Me that he has his secret life and then he has his real life. He couldn’t arouse suspicion with his girlfriend having to answer txts so he told Me a passel of lies and expected Me to just believe him.

Unfortunately I don’t believe him and I told him so. I wrote him a long letter telling him exactly what I felt. As it was a situation that he could not prove he was telling the truth and without proof I would not believe him, I told him I needed to take some time to assess the situation and see if I could find a clear path forward. I gave him specific expectations I had for him in that time and very clear instructions. He chose to ignore everything I instructed him to do as well as My expectations. He chose to throw a god awful fit. He chose to attack Me and seize on a miniscule part of the letter and ignore the real issue, mainly that I felt he lied repeatedly to Me. In the end he behaved so poorly that instead of taking the couple of days to evenly assess the situation I made an on the spot decision to dismiss him.

Frankly I don’t need that level of drama in My life. I don’t associate with liars. I don’t associate with disrespectful people (unless I am related to them). I DEFINITELY don’t retain submissives who are disrespectful, argumentative and who fail to grasp basic concepts even when presented with the over and over again. And in the end, it is virtual. Not real life. So it would never be real to Me.

Good riddance to bad rubbish.