Pre post apocalyptic thoughts

It’s a wonderful week for an apocalypse! That’s right, this Friday is the day that the Mayans will pull themselves out of their graves and sweep across the globe spreading death in their wake. Or if some of the local church billboards are to be believed Jesus (who apparently follows the Mayan calendar) will come to Earth on a shiny rainbow and take all the good kids up to heaven. Or, as my husband is hoping for, it’s the day that he begins his life as a Zombie Killer. Or, perhaps it is just the end of a sophisticated calendar system(What with all calendars having a beginning and an end). We will find out soon enough, won’t we? No. Ours is not to wonder why, ours is to do and/or die. But, sitting here on the verge of something (or nothing) I find myself getting reflective. If this is the end of the world (or another Friday) what really matters? Have I done...enough. Have I accomplished enough of the desires in my heart to be able to look back on it and say ‘Yes. Yes I had a good, good life.’? It’s a hard question. What standard against which do I measure? To my in-laws standard I have certainly failed. Not enough money made and saved. To my parents standard…well they would be satisfied if I lived in a lean-to in the woods. As long as I was happy. The only standard against which I can measure the fullness of my life is against my own. And like most things in my life, it has its’ own soundtrack. The song is “Somebody” (I believe) and is by an amazing man and a talented singer named LeRoy White. This LeRoy White http://youtu.be/gXhWvDe2s58 not those other LeRoy Whites. I couldn’t find his song on the internet but the main point is: “At the end of my days, all I pray, Is that I have somebody who really, really, really loves me.” That is the standard to which I measure my life. And to that standard I am fulfilled. I am successful beyond even my own dreams. For whatever good deed I did in my past life I was rewarded in this by finding, befriending, marrying and loving the most wonderful man in the world. It isn’t the thousands of things he does for me to show his devotion and love, it is the wonderful person he is that makes me lucky. I have never met someone like him. It is truly a privilege to share my life with him. I have a beautiful, intelligent, funny daughter who is so much her own person at times it can be her downfall. But she is all the better for it. She is the very definition of love, loved and loving. She heals hearts and delights in all. I adore her beyond words. I have an amazing group of friends whose friendship is built upon the solid foundation of self awareness and exploration. Not for us the mundane friendship built on small talk and platitudes. No, we’d rather cut right to the meat of the matter and run, laughing toward our bliss. So if the close of the week were to bring me to the end of my days I know can say without hesitation that I do have somebody, many somebodies actually who do really, really, really love me. Each of which I really, really, really love in return. So bring on the apocalypse. Bring the zombies and the Mayans and the Rapture and anything else. Because I am loved. And I’ve got 2 military supply airlift boxes full of survival gear and supplies. But mostly the love thing.